Despicable (BWWM Bully Romance)
Coming to eBook soon…
NEXT RELEASE IN THE SERIES: April 17th
The serial Despicable with 275 episodes will be thoroughly updated and published in a series of six eBooks & paperbacks.
Here are the book titles for the series…
Book #1 Despicable
Book #2 Damaged
Book #3 Depraved
Book #4 Deranged
Book #5 Disturbed
Book #6 Desired
Bookmark and visit this page for more updates on the series. ❤️
Keep scrolling to learn more about how the eBook version will be different from the serial and how you can own your eBook and/or paperback copies of the dark bully romance series.
NEW eBook cover
For the eBook version of Despicable, I went with a more traditional “bully romance” style cover. Crispin and Amina’s story has a lot of dark energy at first and I thought this cover fit with the themes in the book.
NEW updates to the story line & chapters
The new releases will all have updates to the new story line, character arcs and the love scenes between Crispin + Amina. I included the Prologue on this page so you can dive into the new, updated story.
Click here to pre order the book before reading the chapter…
Prologue
The Epilogue of Unbroken
CRISPIN HARGREAVES BARCLAY
Amina stands alone at the party. I don’t remember when I decided to kill her. But I will. Soon. Sorry, Libby. You didn’t save me.
Amina is black. Dark. Dangerously thin. And tall. Not taller than I am. But I’m 6’5”, so that’s hard to beat. She’s so... vulnerable. Even in her large clothing, she’s clearly starving. Still pretty, though.
Amina always dresses in black and rough leather boots so she looks intimidating. Tonight isn’t any different. She can’t hide that skinniness with oversized black hoodies and fishnet tights, though. Gigantic eyes. I don’t buy her tough girl act. She may put up a fight but in the end, I’ll have her.
I push past some gawking, awkward Year 12 classmates at our first Rapetti Academy party, beelining towards her. She doesn’t notice me coming. She would probably vanish if she did considering my reputation. I’m sure her little friends have spread the rumors going around in The Sun and The Telegraph.
She has her hair parted so there are two buns on the top of her head and then a mass of curls behind her that drapes down her thin back. Her elbows at her sides are bony and stick out from her torso. She’s not one of those girls who seems awkward and uncomfortable with herself. No, her armor is far too effective.
I can’t lie, I love the gothic get-up. It’s much better than the snooty pink and green worn by the majority of the girls at our school who share my background, which I’m assuming Amina doesn’t. When I get close enough to touch her, she doesn’t even turn to look at me.
She doesn’t notice me. I suppress the rage that instinctively courses through me from being ignored.
“Tough girl,” I sneer at her, getting her attention without using her name, “Enjoying the party?”
“What do you want?” she snaps back, turning to me with an angry frown. She’s not wearing any makeup, but I think it makes her more beautiful. Her giant dark brown eyes stand all on their own without any accoutrements. She has the fullest, darkest lips I’ve ever seen. My cock lurches. Hurt her. I want to hurt her.
“You smell like liquor,” I respond, getting close enough to smell her. That’s when I just about lose myself. It’s her. She’s definitely the one that I want. I’m pretending to sniff the liquor on her, but what I really want is to get absolutely drunk off her smell. Her shower gel must have hints of pomegranate in it.
She waves her hand in my face, urging me to stand back.
“Yes. I’m drunk. So what? Gonna snitch, Mr. Perfect?” she says, slurring a bit.
Her voice drips with sarcasm but all I heard was ‘Mr. Perfect’. I get straight to the point with her because I need to test her.
“Are you a slut?”
“What did you say to me?” she says, sounding all indignant. I love the fight in her. I imagine her fight will make breaking her more enjoyable. But I don’t know what I’ll enjoy. I won’t know until tonight.
“Are you American?” I ask her, ignoring her feisty little response to me.
“Duh.”
“Scholarship kid?”
She stumbles and leans against the wall, a few drops of beer spilling down her chin. I want to lick it up. I want to strangle her.
Amina rolls her eyes and slurs, “Because I’m black doesn’t mean I’m a scholarship kid.”
“Right. But you’re one of those sensitive politically correct types.”
“Shut up.”
She attempts to push away from me but I’m too big for her to get around me if I don’t want her to. I put an arm out to block her from passing around me and she scowls at me with absolute fury. It doesn’t matter, she can’t move. She’s much too small to fight me, although judging by the expression on her face, she wants to try.
“Dance with me,” I command her.
I’m hoping she’ll say yes. I’m hoping I get to hold her.
She raises an already arched brow. I wait a beat, wanting her to say ‘yes’, knowing I could make her if I wanted to.
She gives me the sassiest, most disgusting look ever and responds, “No. Never. I don’t dance with white boys.”
“What’s wrong with white boys?”
“Everything.”
“A bit racist,” I say, unsure whether I believe my own accusation.
“Like you aren’t? Every white person at Rapetti is racist. Don’t care. I’m only here because my parents are making me go here. I don’t care about white people. I don’t care about white people shit. Fuck all of you. I’m only here for my friends.”
She stumbles forward again and spills some alcohol from her cup.
“You’re drunk,” I say, and I’m about to suggest she head back to the dorms. It’s like my subconscious mind wants to step in and take her out of danger instead of into it. Maybe I just want to walk with her. It’s loud in here and I can get a good look at her, but I can’t hear her well enough. I can’t get close without drawing attention to myself.
She’s cute when she’s drunk. A girl stumbles past us and nearly spills her beer all over me. I fight every instinct to call her a rude name.
We’ve only been at school one week and everyone in my year insists on acting like bloody idiots. It’s hard to think.
“Yeah,” Amina yells, “I’m drunk and I’m looking for my fuck buddy. So can you move out my goddamn way?”
“No,” I say to her plainly, “I can’t.”
“MOVE!” she yells.
I’m not interested in complying with Amina.
“Last name.”
“Why the fuck do you need to know?”
“Tell me, tough girl.”
“Hewett. You freak.”
I grab her arm and pull her close to me. I could hurt her now. Amina Hewett has bones like a baby bird’s and they all jut through her dark skin.
Her “fuck buddy” enters the room. I know it’s him because they both look at each other and they give each other that look that people give when they’ve done it. The thought of him seeing her naked makes me see red. That burly red-headed idiot is in my dorm and right now, he’s staring at her – my prize. He smiles to reveal eerily straight teeth. Wanker. He stares at Amina like he’s grateful for her attention.
I loathe him.
“Bye, Crispin.”
She slips her arm in his and she stumbles upstairs with him. I hate her for wanting him. Her desire, like her sloppiness, offend my sensibilities. Yet...
Amina is my perfect victim. It’s instinctive. It’s something I felt the first time I saw her, a compulsion I need to act on. This is the second time I’ve met her and the tightness in my chest can only mean one thing. It’s happening again. I need to kill.
I was anxious like this on the night they died.
I know what Liberty would tell me now. It’s a panic attack, Crispin. It wasn’t your fault. Sweet girl. Without her, I wouldn’t have come to Rapetti at all. I wouldn’t have this pounding in my chest and this yearning to become the monster they think I am.
I take my distance from the crowd, ignoring the blood rushing past my ears, focusing on the sensations of my heart beating fast. I need a fucking cigarette. I don’t think. I just smoke. I don’t even care where I am. I shouldn’t be here.
As I lean against the wall, earning a glare from everyone for smoking inside, Kaito stumbles across the room. His eyes betray his Japanese heritage. At least his dad’s English, so he’s well-bred and never shows up without a cigarette for me.
“Looks like you’ve already got one,” Kaito says, smiling. His eyes disappear when he smiles. I find him unnerving, but comfortable enough to hang around because he doesn’t ask me any questions about my past and if he’s heard the rumors about me, Kaito doesn’t appear to give half a fuck.
He sticks the cigarette into his own mouth and lights it. Kaito’s nearly my height and he doesn’t have any concept of personal space. He hugs me, forcing my face into his jacket’s Scottish tweed, damp from the rain outside.
“Bloody rain. It makes me miss Okinawa.”
“Fuck Japan. Next break, we go to Moscow. Russian chicks. Insanely hot.”
Kaito elbows me and smokes inside too. A brunette girl with high heels stomps past us and sneers under her breath, “Don’t smoke inside, sick fucks.”
“Tits, watch your mouth!”
She whirls around enraged.
“What the hell did you just say to me you chauvinist pig?”
I tell her with a smile on my face, “You ought to watch how you talk to men, tits.”
“You can’t run around calling women ‘tits’.”
“Would you prefer he call you a slut?” Kaito sneers.
Amina appears behind Tits. Great. I thought she was with someone? How long has it been, five minutes? I suppose that red-headed wanker didn’t last long. Fuck, I thought she was out of here. Out of sight, out of mind and all that.
Of all the idiot bimbos at this stupid party, we had to bother the one friends with the most annoying girl at school.
Amina gets all haughty and puffs out her chest before saying, “Her name is Violet Bainbridge.”
Feisty. I hate that.
“Shut up, twig,” Kaito says.
Not his best insult, but Amina’s face falls.
“Real mature,” Amina snaps, “Leave her alone. Come on, Vi.”
I grab Amina’s arm so she can’t run off. Kaito grabs Violet. They both scream. Everyone gathers around us because of Violet’s scream. She gets louder and begs Kaito to let go of her arm, but he squeezes tighter and twists. It’s going to get violent.
They all know who I am. They all know what the police say about me and they want to watch the show. They want to know if I’m the monster the tabloids say. They want to see if they can glimpse the monster.
If they want a taste of my dark side, I’ll give it to them. I push Amina against the wall and take a knife with a six inch smooth blade out of my shirt. They’re cheering.
“FIGHT. FIGHT.”
Someone yells, “KILL HER!”
Another yells, “STAB HER.” That’s a bit excessive. I assume it’s someone drunk making a joke. But they shouldn’t joke. I’d rather like the idea.
Amina wriggles and kicks me. She won’t go down without a fight even if I have a cold blade pressed to her chest. I press it deeper and she sucks in air. One wrong move on her part and I’ll draw blood without moving a muscle.
“Understand one thing, Amina Hewett. I own this school. You’re a skinny little nothing lucky to get the time of day from me. Push back against me with your attitude and I will win. Do you understand?”
She screams and I make a thin slice on her stomach. She screams. More from surprise than pain. The cut isn’t deep enough to injure her permanently.
“GET OFF ME!” She yells.
Daniella storms around the corner in high combat boots. She shaved her head over the summer. The adopted daughter of the Friedrich family is noticeably different from her family with smooth, dark skin. She has their brutality, though. I don’t like being near Daniella.
“What the fuck is going on at my fucking party?” Daniella yells.
“Two cunts out of line,” Kaito tells Daniella, leaning forward and licking Vi’s cheek as she screams.
August snickers at Vi’s panicked reaction, but Daniella frowns as August looks at her and tugs his attention back in the correct direction. Insecure and it’s obvious. Not my brother’s usual type. August notices Daniella’s insecure slip-up and smirks. She doesn’t notice, but I grew up studying my brother’s face. It was the only way to survive his moods.
August slips his hand into Daniella’s, subtly reminding her that if she doesn’t take my side he will make her single again. For a Year 13, being single is social suicide.
“I think you should teach her a lesson, Dani,” August says calmly.
“Let me go!” Amina yells, attempting to punch me. I throw her against the wall, her chest heaving and keep her pinned even tighter.
“Don’t you dare,” I snarl at her through gritted teeth.
Daniella patiently wanders between Amina and Vi, a queen deciding how to punish her subjects. My brother walks with her, his fingers interlaced with hers. His tall, big-boned girlfriend has a tenuous grasp on Rapetti’s social scene. She can hold her own with violence and pushing girls around to do her bidding, but a queen can fall far too easily at this school without a king.
Daniella Friedrich will do anything to be the queen of this campus. She’ll even fuck my idiot brother, who cheated on her all summer long without even trying to hide it. Like I said, obviously insecure.
As Dani steps back and forth, purposefully heightening the tension in the room, Amina attempts to fight me off again but I immobilize her. I want to do what Kaito did to Vi, taste her. But something so intimate feels wrong here. It’s enough to touch her and feel her squirming. To smell the adrenaline on her. It’s the most excitement I’ve had in hours.
I don’t care about the greater social context at our school, I just want to hold her. Amina glares at me and I look away from her. I like her trapped.
Vi doesn’t bother wriggling, but that bothers Kaito. He wants her to fight. He keeps licking her face and her neck, tasting her and treating her like a piece of candy until she finally lashes out and tries to kick him in the balls. She fails because of how he’s holding her and how much larger he is, but this gives him the perfect excuse to overreact.
Kaito slams Vi’s head against the wall. She screams. She doesn’t have Amina Hewett’s desire to fight back.
“Go on, Dani,” August provokes Daniella, squeezing her hand impatiently. “Teach them a lesson. They’re weak. They deserve it.”
I don’t know why he’s with her. She’s nothing like other girls he’s liked, so he must be using her. What does August need from anyone?
“Drop them. I’ll show you all how I teach Year 12s a lesson,” she says, finally convinced.
Dani raises her voice, enjoying the attention more than anyone should. This is Daniella’s year to rule. I don’t like how she seems to crave attention.
“All you bitches might have heard how we do things at Rapetti Academy,” Daniella announces to a captivated room, “You heard wrong. I am fucking untouchable. I do what I want, how I want. If you’re in this room, watch this and tell your little Year 12 friends. They fuck with me or anyone in the year above, this is what happens.”
Kaito and I let go of the girls. Misaki, my ex-girlfriend, emerges from behind August and Danny. I feel a pang of worry when I see her. I haven’t spoken to her in months.
Misaki’s lips bulge forward and she rolls her mouth around before a razor blade materializes from beneath her tongue. She holds it between her teeth. Amina screams. Another betrayal emerges.
Amina’s burly red-headed “fuck buddy” holds her back, restraining her arms.
“Do it,” Daniella commands.
As he restrains Amina and August restrains Violet Bainbridge, my ex-girlfriend struts forward. They use the razor blades to cut Amina’s clothing off. My heart races as I see her naked for the first time. She screams as the first bit of fabric falls away from her chest. A dark brown round breast escapes with a tiny, perky dark nipple. I’m hard, instantly.
Amina screams as they cut away the rest of her clothes, but she doesn’t move. Her legs are fucking smooth and thin. I imagine them wrapped around me, but I’d probably break her. Neither captive girl can thrash without risking her life. They whimper and wait for the work to finish. As more of Amina’s body unveils before me, I lose my fucking head.
I want those legs. I want those lips. And fuck, those tits.
Daniella makes her new minions cut all their clothes off. Including their underwear.
Once the clothes lie in shreds on the ground, Daniella folds her arms and whistles. Another Year 12 boy hands her a bottle of vodka. She takes it and pours it out over their heads while the boys hold them down. Daniella pulls a lighter out of her pocket.
“Everyone, get your lighters out.”
Whoever has a lighter fishes it out of their pocket.
“Okay, bitches,” Danny continues, “Which will be easier to catch? The black bitch or the white bitch?”
Half the room chants white. The other half chants black. I won’t distress you by saying which side is louder. Danny eggs them on, soaking up the attention
And then she gives her final command.
“White bitch, black bitch... your job is to run back to campus. Whoever catches one of them on fire gets my new car! Kaito, August, let them go. I’ll give them a ten second head start.”
They’re both shaking from the cold. Violet is taller and a little plumper than Amina, but her knees wobble more. She’s more terrified. Amina’s hair puffs out behind her in a giant cloud but Violet’s sticks to her neck. I stop looking at Violet. I don’t care anymore. Once I start counting, I only need to fix my eyes on Amina Hewett. My prize. Blood rushes past my ears anticipating the thrill of the hunt.
“Are they really going to do this,” Violet whimpers.
“Stay strong, Vi,” Amina says. “And run for your fucking life.”
Tonight will be absolutely fucking unhinged and I know it.
I start the count.
“10...9...”
The girls run. Naked. I don’t see which direction Violet Bainbridge runs in. My eyes won’t leave Amina. She’s naked. Her breasts swing out from her thin torso and she runs out of the house, panting loudly. I can run faster than everyone here. I can run fast enough to catch her. So that’s exactly what I do.
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